He always took the calls, too, which, in retrospect, strikes me as remarkably tolerant. I remember several occasions in my childhood when our family’s Sunday dinner was interrupted by phone calls to my father (who wrote this column for nearly 40 years) from his readers. Were I to restrict my attention to “tattletale,” the mob of angry readers would be sharpening their pitchforks before nightfall. But once you mentioned the other two phrases, the genie was out of the bottle.

Where in the world did a silly sounding term like “tattletale” come from? - Bob. Fear not, I do not have three questions, I only have one. It was actually pretty funny and I told her friends that she was a tattletale and, unfortunately, proud of it. Help the tattletale explore a variety of activities and sign them up for one they enjoy.A rat by any other name smells about the same.ĭear Word Detective: The other day my daughter dropped a dime on me and told a story out of school. If you’re the parent of a tattletale child, you could insist that your child participates in extracurricular activities like soccer, hockey, and chess club that build mental toughness and independence.

Provide challenges for the tattletale.

This will instill a 'can-do' attitude within the child over time. For instance, instead of making dinner for your child every night, you could invite them to help out doing simple tasks in the kitchen like measuring water or other ingredients. Parents and other caretakers can help kids to adopt an independent spirit by doing things together with their child.

Do things with the child rather than for them.

Teens might need to take out the trash, wash the dishes, or babysit their younger siblings. Parents can ask their young children to organize the shoes in the closet. In elementary school, teachers can ask kids to clean up toys when playtime has concluded. Give the child tasks to do that correspond to their age and ability level. Independent children, however, are better equipped to solve problems on their own and less likely to engage in tattling.

Tattletales rely on their parents or other adults in charge to rescue them and make things right. Suggest that the tattletale child say, 'Please be quiet.'Įncourage the tattletale to be independent. For instance, if the tattletale complains that their classmate is bothering them, suggest to the tattletale child that next time it happens, they should ask their classmate to kindly be quiet.Encourage the tattletale to exhaust all possible avenues for problem resolution before discussing it with an adult. Other situations where tattling is unnecessary include situations where the child could solve the problem themselves.The teacher can choose to discipline that child if they wish.' If your classmate is doodling in their notebook while the teacher is talking, there’s no need to report this. For example, you might say, 'If a situation does not involve you, do not report it.For instance, if a child is doodling in their notebook while the teacher is talking, they should not report this improper behavior since the teacher can choose to discipline that child if they wish. Make it clear to the child that if a situation does not involve them, they should not report it. Schedule some family therapy sessions if your kids engage in extreme sibling rivalry.Įxplain to the tattletale child when they should not tattle. Some level of sibling rivalry is normal, but if it lapses into tattletale behavior (or worse, bullying), you’ll need to take steps to correct it.Help them find ways to channel their emotions in productive directions. Encourage them to share how they feel when things go well and when things don’t go well. If you’re a parent, help your kids develop healthy emotional lives.Keep up the good work.' X Research source I am proud of you.' Tell Edwin, 'You did a great job on your math test. For instance, if Jane and Edwin are engaged in sibling rivalry that leads to tattletale behavior, tell Jane, 'You are a great artist. Attend to the differences that make each child special. Praise them both, but not in the same ways. To discourage sibling rivalry, pay equal attention to both children.This same dynamic might be driving tattletale behavior in the relationship between two classmates who don’t get along. If two siblings don’t get along, one child might tattle on the other in order to gain pleasure from seeing the other punished.